It's getting harder each time

It's been awhile but I am recovering, slowly but surely.

Nothing and no one is tougher than constipation - I put my money on it. It is the hardest thing to get over. All the aids that supposedly help barely do it because they have other side effects. And luckily constipation is temporary side effect and I am truly thankful for that - truly.

The effect of my chemo drug FEC (Fluorouracil, Epirubicin, Cyclophosphamide) has been hard on my veins. I can't have needles of any kind on my left arm due to my lymph node surgery so all needles have to be on my right arm and it really hurts. I called the chemo nurse today and she said it is a side effect and nothing we can do about it. FEC is generally hard on the veins and is my next chemo drug - Docetaxel. This drug also can affect my nerve endings as well as my veins. Oh joy! Don't fret - I will concur and survive but this whole thing sucks.

It looks like my hair is not returning as fast like in the past. I have very small and sporatic stubble on my scalp and my eyebrows are thinning. I have signed up for the 'Look Good Feel Better' seminar in June. Hopefully it will help with the way I feel about myself. It is hard to stay up - a constant repeat of positive affirmations. Everyone join in - "it SUCKS!"

I had a long walk today and I feel better. I just want to jump into exercise, eating right, and be more involved and active but I can't for now and this position of being is extremely hard. Everything is on hold and it Sucks! Talking about sucking - I have an urge to make smoothie popsicles to SUCK on. ;o)